got milk?

Ah, the trials and tribulations of office life.
That would be the staff kitchen, or more specifically the staff fridge. Yes, the place to store your sustenance for the day ahead, although, be warned, you place something in there, and it becomes the property of the entire staff room.
Here at work, we have an issue with milk. Yes, milk. The school provides staff with long life milk, you know the stuff you buy in cartons? Yeah, that milk. Now, some people prefer to drink fresh milk. I can understand that, fresh milk is ahm.. fresher! Anyway, so, these people buy little cartons of fresh milk on their way to work and put them in the fridge here for their cereal, porridge, coffee etc. Only thing is, you put milk in this fridge, and inevitably other people will drink it. Now this has caused major arguments between staff, which has ended in malicious fights and overall evilness. For example, this morning, a staff member went to the kitchen this morning, to pour some delicious fresh milk over her cereal, and she discovered that her milk, which she had bought yesterday and left in the fridge unopened, had been opened, drunk and there was barely a drop left. She became incredibly irate and got more than a little angry at the other staff members. I walked through the staff room as she was giving the other staff a piece of her mind... Yikes, I'm glad I don't drink any of the milk (supplied or individually bought) or use that fridge. Came back to my desk, and thought, perhaps its because they don't realise that people buy that milk out of their own pocket, perhaps they don't realise which milk the school provides the staff, and thought, I should construct a sign to clearly state exactly which milk is for their use... Hehe. It follows:

The milk that the school provides staff is the long life full cream milk. If there is fresh milk, skim milk, specially imported yak milk, soy milk or anything else other than long life full cream milk in this fridge, someone has specifically bought it for their own personal use with their own money. If there is no long life full cream milk in this fridge, it may be found in the storeroom, in the grey cabinet. If there is no long life full cream milk in the grey cabinet, we have run out and it will be purchased shortly.

In the meantime, please do not drink the other milk in this fridge unless you wish to start WWIII. Thank you!

My creative outlet.. can you tell? It makes me laugh. I mean, its just milk.. but it really does create wars here. And I do understand it. The point is, you shouldn't touch anything in that fridge unless you put it in there yourself, or you know that the company provides it... And its the little things... :) Chuckle chuckle. The yak's milk reference comes from another incident. Individually bought milk was drunk, and so a sign was created for that particular carton. It went along the lines of: This milk was specially imported from Tibet. It is yak's milk that has travelled over the mountains, over oceans, deserts to get to Brisbane. If you drink it, you will die.

Hahaha. This is my amusement for the day... hahaha